Monday, October 11, 2010

Mewkie's Pet Peeves... and general NO NO's....

All Righty Then.... Here are just a few of Mewkie's Pet Peeves and over all BIG NO NO's someone in a car can do to a truck driver......

So let's review.... Let me pull up a handy dandy diagram of awesomeness.....
As you can see... your car or truck is NOTHING compared to the height and weight of my Semi.... Add the trailer and I will flatten you like a geo metro at a monster truck rally... Contrary to what most drivers on the road believe... we do not stop as fast as cars... we do not turn as sharp as cars... we do not accelerate as fast as cars....


Here is a diagram of where you should never hang out whilst driving along side a big rig.... See the RED?  See it?????? STAY THE FREAK OUT OF THAT!!!!!  That little sticker on the back of most trucks that say if you can't see my mirrors, I can't see you... it's really not there for decoration... it really isn't lying to you either.... Never stay in the blind spot of a truck... unless you like to ride on the wild side... 

Ok... now check out some of the ridiculousness I have come across lately... it seems to be happening more and more....


Here we have the red car of stupidness quickly getting in front of the truck... Never mind that he tried to rip Mewkie's bumper off in the process... You should always leave at least a whole car length in front of the truck before you merge in front of it....

ooo.... add this trick to the mix....


That's right... this idiot has zipped in front of me... and SLAMMED on their brakes to turn right... heaven forbid he wait 3 seconds while I pass this intersection for him to turn right at a safe speed....... Mewkie is dreaming heavily of monster trucks right about now.....

Another stupid move....


Merging....

Really people? Get it through your head.  The FREEWAY has the right of way.  Not the person merging onto it.  But instead I get this....


This is the general look I get when they realize a BIG FREAKING SEMI TRUCK IS ABOUT TO TAKE OFF THEIR SIDE FENDER.....

So while they slam on their brakes to get behind me... instead of just driving like a normal person... oh no.... I get this...


That's right.  I get the bright lights and honks till this person is in front of me.  Some have even gone to great lengths to get in front of me and slam on their brakes.... You showed me moron! Keep up the good driving skills! Hope you have season tickets to the monster truck show!  I will OWN you....



And last but not least... my least favorite driving condition...


That's right.  OLD PEOPLE.  Not only do the majority of them have tunnel vision, they go slow.  My truck only goes 63 mph due to it being governed.  That means I go no faster than 63.  Here comes Grandpa and Grandma driving on the freeway to their latest doctor visit... they take forever to catch up to me... then, like magic.... Grandpa finds the accelerator... he passes me... he's in front... I'm about to applaud him... then... his foot looses it's grip on the accelerator... he's slowing down... just under 63.... I catch right up to him... I go to pass... he finds his footing again.... No way am I going to pass him now Grandpa thinks!!!!!!  We play this stupid game of "pass me if you can" for at least 10 minutes... then Grandpa has to get off at the rest stop to pee... Victory is mine old man! I sing praises to your wrinkly old bladder!!!!!

This has been a public service announcement from Mewkie to all the moronic drivers out there... I'm watching you!!!!

1 comment:

  1. I sped up, cut in front, then slammed on the brakes in front of a rig once. With my kid in the back seat, no less. Made him lock up and smoke his tires. I could see his purple face screaming and I knew there was never any adequate apology I could ever make except to never, NEVER do that again.

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